Time-Travel can be Hazardous to your Readers
Words are a fantastic time-machine. Words can move readers both forward and backwards in time with ease and simplicity.
But time-traveling writers must beware! Sometimes, writers get confused and lose the focus of their words. This can leave their readers dazed and confused, and lost in a time-warp.
For example, I recently read this little local news article (not an AP story) and it made my head hurt:
North Texas town pumps hot water from the ground
LADONIA: About 80 miles northeast of Dallas, at Hwy. 50 south and Main Street, a small town braces for another chilly night. But in Ladonia, the water from its well – nearly 3,500 feet deep – is still piping hot.
The proof is in the bucket with the water registering 97 degrees on a thermometer. Even the pipes are warm to the touch.
As I read this – the words are describing a condition as it is now, currently, in the present. To me – words and phrases such as – ‘…is still piping hot’, ‘…is in the bucket’, ‘…are warm to the touch’ – are all present tense – in the here and now. Ok, got it – right now the water is hot – 97 degrees (Fahrenheit I assume) – I read on:
The town’s water superintendent, Mike Davis, remembered when the water flowed out of the tap in homes at 120 degrees.
“They would turn their hot water heaters off to cool down the water,” Davis said. “Instead of heating, they would use them to cool the water. The water was hot, real hot.”
The hot flow frustrated some families including Brandon Johnson’s dad.
“They used to run a bathtub full of water to cool it down,” he said. “Isn’t that crazy? It’s a bit different.”
At that time, the city was pumping 7 million gallons of water a month. A packing plant used around 5 million gallons, so the water inside the tanks never had a chance to cool down.
Now I am in the past. The past tense words and phrases in these sentences - remembered, was, would, then, did, used to, at that time – all clearly signal that I have moved into the past. These words lead me through this time-traveling transition smoothly and easily. I still understand – the water’s hot, used to be even hotter, and had a high usage rate. I read more:
But times have changed. The packing plant is gone, and usage is about 1 million gallons a month.
Now, the water has time to cool down. Out of the tap it struggles to stay at 60 degrees. And during these freezing temperatures, some town veterans are yearning for the old days.
Ok, now I’m back to the present again. The time-traveling transition is a bit abrupt this time, but the writer uses more of those present tense words again, such as: now, is, have, has. The writer also defines the current usage rate – drawing a comparison between then and now. Plus the writer reinforces being in the present by describing current weather conditions.
But wait a minute – back up – something’s not right. Look what the words say. Here the article says the towns water “struggles to stay at 60 degrees”. What? That is in direct contradiction to the title and the leading paragraph.
The title says the water is hot now – the first paragraph does too, and even gives a temperature reading to reinforce it. But this last paragraph is confusing. In my world, not too far from the town in this article - 60 degrees is not hot. It’s a bit warmer than usual for this time of year perhaps – but not hot by any means – and obviously not 97 degrees as stated in the opening paragraph.
I guess this time-traveling writer lost focus, and I’m left confused and wondering… So which is it – now – really? Hot or cold? I’m lost. Oh my aching head.
I’ve got to go lay down now, but I want to look into how this time-warp headache could have been avoided
… later.
